Among my clients, many guys are very interesting to me as interlocutors, potential friends, I close their position in life and we have common interests. Also among them is very steep. But I can't have them learn, can't use their professional services or products. Make friends, engage hobby too.
Why? Because I know that they will suffer from this process of psychotherapy.
With psychologist creates meaningful relationships, similar to those inclined to build a man in her life. But! Due to the fact that the therapeutic relationship creates a space for awareness and discussion of feelings, thoughts, actions, and desires, these relations are realized. The Repertoire of behaviors in them expands, elaborates on the causes of the problems, learning takes place new ways of behaviour. This customer experience takes with itself and uses in its relations with other people.
If a psychologist starts again and skating with the client walk, and in the bar, and in the overall company, this space for awareness and feedback disappears. Friendship and psychotherapy are incompatible. I had an experience at the dawn of practice, I'm sorry.
Let me give you an example. If in conjunction with a friend I have anger, but in general we trust, I can s″âzvit′, blame, or talk about their unpleasant feeling in very direct terms, if I didn't share and I'm deeply hurt something.
In a relationship with a client I am aware of the anger, choose way of expression depending on the circumstances of this anger: whether it is the result of the influence of my personal past experience or a natural reaction to the violation of the borders, how the resource condition client now and in what form he is able to endure and whether in General. The psychologist is different from one another: can separate her from yours, is making efforts to do so, passes personal therapy and to supervise their roaches with you do not wipe away, and see your and your resources. And their resources to be able to replenish.
Use professional services or products their customers psychologist should not, because the client has a special relationship to it. The client may not fully take into account their financial interests to do discounts, afraid to refuse a psychologist, while consciously or unconsciously it can feel pressure, suppressed anger and other feelings, so the consultation it was difficult for him to open.
These limitations of my profession I sometimes agree with sadness. I'm finding interesting people, extend social circle so that it matches my interests and emotional needs, sometimes feel the deficit in this area. Hence the sadness that he is an interesting man, himself came and I can't discuss their interests with him for his money)) or is a wonderful teacher that I want to be able to, and have to go to another. I know colleagues who do not sorrow about the sexual attractiveness of their clients and use it, but it's absolutely beyond good and evil.
It's about another difference psychologist from girlfriends: he understands their needs and is not seeking to satisfy them all with a client, because he can otherwise. You don't have to be a mother to him, vest, Assistant, lifeguard, self-assertion tool, lover, support, a source of knowledge or foreman in response to what it helps you. He gets money for it.
That is why the consultation of psychologist should cost a decent money.
P.s. so unobtrusively from ethical standards through the personal story I switched to money. ))
Yes, money is a means of balancing in the therapeutic relationship. Therefore, the psychologist should be satiated. In need of money a psychologist it is very difficult to be ethical, immediately pulls send children to Immedi-tutor, barter therapy odnoklassnicu, her husband and his mistress and become the center of Santa Barbara, in which "the rich also cry" because the husband needing a psychologist makes it repair, because they could not refuse her, because she was "such a sensual woman and so they helped!"-a medley of real stories , by the way!)
Oh, all of us forces and responsible meet the needs!)