In the past year I have had meaningful date-5 years from the first client.
At first I wanted to write tips yourself into the past: warn about errors, use straw, where necessary, to expedite the passage of some stages. Became to think about different situations and understood very clearly saw that everything happened on time and maximize correctly for me.
So I will just tell the-imagine what happened with it for 5 years, because great is seen from a distance, and at the moment it is not clear what is happening.
The letter came out very personal, but I think many colleagues it will be close, but not-interesting and colleagues making psychological kitchen more understandable, and psychologists-image more alive, vulnerable and humane. That is why I publish, hoping for your understanding and tact)
1) you came out of a very serious crisis with new experience, the forces, values and objectives. Do you know what you want and learn to listen to ourselves. You learn to take responsibility for their lives. You're tough and strong. But understand: itself has recently experienced a crisis, you know, how much is a pound of down and out. Clients learn to close to you, you have nothing more to give.
2) you learn how to use different methods and techniques mostly on itself. From this your psychological protection falter penetrates consciousness more and more very painful and repressed feelings. Clients will no longer be too harsh and soldiers begin to show very strong feelings, with whom you do not know what to do because in response to their emotions sweep over you.
3) Ty destabilizirueš′sâ and regressirueš′. Instead of you scum often for all or wounded inner child, or the harsh judgmental parent. The inner critic is not giving you peace and noted each mistake. Come clients who do not want to change anything, want to shift responsibility onto others. You mecheshsya between the guilt, shame, own painful experiences. You learn a lot, go to therapy which leads to retravmatizacii.
4) you nosiš′sâ with your own child pain and vulnerability, until you realize that nobody will never warm you up and not love as you need. And you start doing it for itself. Hug yourself, gladiš′, ubaûkivaeš′, write comforting letters, buy dresses, drive in museums. You learn how to keep yourself and others. Behave to a good psychotherapist, talk honestly. And you learn to ask for help. Customers come for support, for warmth, for justification for fiscal deficits.
5) you're sufficiently strengthened to withstand the greatest work: with the marginalized, painful feelings. Do you work with its shock trauma while shame, helplessness, guilt, grief, fear. I don't want to work at all, almost no customers. Think about changing the profession: a joke, every day job open his own wound? And you begin to sort through the options. Do you want to work so that you were good!
6) and here it happens most importantly: you're in my life putting themselves in the first place! It is important is not what you can give to others, not something you wait for, not someone else's rejection or approval, and you. You do that like a lot of fun to paint, learn for the sake of interest, communicate with someone nice. And customers start ringing. The schedule will be filled. Your personal therapy had done its thing, you more often than not taŝiš′ your personal process into a process of customers.
7) Starting again advise, you realized that you can distinguish the pain from its clients, sympathize with them, not taking what is not yours. Set boundaries on time and return them to the responsibility you are faster and smaller: 25.10.12 get tired, you keep stability, even when the client is showing very strong feelings. Customers come to very different and often with a very difficult fate, they want to again learn to rejoice after the difficult life situations.
8) you already have a great education, vystraivaûŝaâsâ therapeutic position. You can listen to yourself and teach the clients can support, help in living difficult feelings, know how to rely on protection rather than demolish them, you learn to face the fate and trust clients, you study them to see and hear. Looking for your own style of work, it is similar to what was in the beginning: it is a clear, solid, but now warm and deep relationship. And you begin to see how people are treated is not knowledge, not technology, not by the customers themselves and not you and the relationship. All sorts of people come and you work with them in different ways.
You has gone a long and thorny path, where everything was on time and maximize correctly for you. Nothing could be faster, avoid, reversed. You did all that she could then and I very happy.
There is still a lot of things. I have a feeling that now everything is just beginning)