"Stay away from those people who are trying to reduce your significance. So always arrive a little people. A really great inspire you the feeling that you, too, can become great "

Mark Twain, writer



Here there are such people: they pretty much all know very strictly refer to themselves, assess themselves only on very high standards, they can say that masterpiece, and complete n. gibberish;. In General, people are thin-experts and knowledge.


But that's approachable and like an hour ago was full of hope, joy and creative plans, and now all nonchalance: a strange restlessness, a sense that you're waving a shocking! in their dreams, anything you do not know and do not know how that dressed or dressed you country and generally it is time to lose weight. So why does this happen?


But just you met a man-inflator, which everyone always devalues. Victim of its depreciation often is he himself in virtue realization problems, but once you fall under the arm, why not devalue and you?



Immediately I say that man-inflâtoru do nothing to reduce shares your self-esteem, you are doing it perfectly in his presence when thinking: "he's so cool, and the results of their unhappy. Certainly I have more drawbacks, I just can't see them because I didn't understand, and he sees! "or" she won what figure, and she is still unhappy, fitness walks, then I generally lazy cow! ". I often see on the my trainings right-brain drawing: one started swearing at his job, and the rest followed his example, not to sound complacent or minor.


So, the man himself has been harassing constant criticism, but in the presence of us uncomfortable/scared/ashamed to be satisfied is for different reasons.



The other option is when a man isstadavšis′ due to exorbitant demands towards ourselves, denies itself to do something because the bitterness has arrogated to himself the title of ineptitude. And here you are with your enthusiasm, inspiration and committing specific, albeit small steps! Well not Nahal? You urgently need to "put in place" a pair of caustic comments uničižaûŝih!


For example, dreamed someone become a writer, but failed with an internal critic, experienced creative crisis and began to write only reviews, abandoning the independent creativity. Now he carries to smithereens young authors who think they can be writers, although even he, however, and thin, did not dare to arrogate to itself the proud title! "


This inflator, unlike previous devalues actively, not just by their presence and quibbling to yourself. But this active depreciation can be unperceived, unless one recognizes that feels envy.




Sometimes, however, depreciation can be intentional, i.e. a way of manipulations. Often co-dependent relationship partner devalues everything that makes a different. Then the latter always remains the feeling that it gives enough. He decides that we need to try harder to earn the love of a partner and be good for him.  Many use it in parenting. This mystery origin people-inflators.




If you are faced with the devaluation, this can be either a manipulation or a reflection of the internal problems of man-power inflator. However, mood, tone and self-esteem fall you have anyway. Understanding the nature of this phenomenon can help you protect yourself.


If you really want to create something, learn to separate depreciation from criticism, and inflators-from yourself.


Constructive criticism should be specific, man must objectively understand the issue, and you have after his comments should be encouraged: "exactly, but I think it is not so! Thanks, that helped see go'll build on! " 


But if a man does not understand, and just decided to announce their opinion about your activities under the guise of a: "everyone is entitled to their own opinion", remember that you have the right to decide whose opinion and when to listen. At the stage of gestation and the idea of these "mnenienoscy" are bad news for almost everyone, remember this and not be themselves enemies of his creativity.


Used figure of Tatiana Samoškinoj and photos of Ann Radchenko

Written by Анна

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